Regarding marriage, the writer Fu Lei said in the book "Fu Lei’s Book", and once said such a paragraph:
To find a permanent partner, you have to consider it more with rationality and not be blinded by emotions!The lover’s vision will change when you get married, and you don’t believe it yourself: if you don’t think of this in advance, you must recruit infinite pain later.
The revelation that this sentence brings us is: marriage is a lifelong event of a person, and should be treated with a rational attitude. If only a moment of chaos is obsessed, there will be a romantic relationship with the object that does not understand.Make your life a mess.
Psychologists believe that the development of emotions between people requires a gradual process. If a relationship relationship is too fast, the couple will not understand each other because they do not understand each other, and the role of the "hedgehog effect" will be in the "hedgehog effect".In the following, there is a contradiction between the opponent and alertness, so that in the future process of getting along.
But in real life, some girls do not understand this truth. They will have a close relationship with the opposite sex with each other under the impulse of perceptual impulse.A way of love, in the eyes of the man, this practice of girls will seem a bit insufficient.
If you want to get happiness in a love or marriage relationship, you must know how to maintain rationality. In emotional relationships, only a woman who loves can get the love of the lover.
Azhi (pseudonym), 26 years old, has been pregnant for 7 months. She lives in Fuzhou with her boyfriend Xiaoqiang (pseudonym), but not long ago, the two quarreled because of some trivial matters. This made Xiaoqiang overnight overnight overnight overnightFall the door and go.
Azhi said aggrieved, I have been pregnant for 7 months now. He (Xiaoqiang) said in a word, no matter how I care about me, I don’t know what to do?
So, what contradictions occurred between Azhi and Xiaoqiang, so that Xiaoqiang would leave the girlfriend who was 7 months pregnant and left alone?
Azhi said that she was in a mood during pregnancy and always wanted to cry. One night, she managed to fall asleep, but her boyfriend woke her up.
Azhi told her boyfriend, "Can you turn over and be light? I can hardly sleep like this.
What made Azhi unexpected was that her boyfriend Xiaoqiang accused her "like neuropathy."
The words of her boyfriend made Azhi angry. She patted her boyfriend across the quilt, but her boyfriend slapped on her face in turn.
Afterwards, Xiaoqiang fell away and left Azhi alone in the rental house.
Xiaoqiang’s attitude disappointed Azhi about this relationship, and she even thought of breaking up with her boyfriend.
Azhi said that he (Xiaoqiang) had no feelings for me, and she was with Xiaoqiang because of this child. Now she doesn’t want to live with Xiaoqiang.
Why is Azhi’s relationship with Xiaoqiang so fragile?Faced with this problem, Azhi recalled that she was like a joke with Xiaoqiang.
It turned out that Azhi and Xiaoqiang knew through a blind date. The two of them only had a close relationship together for only one night. Afterwards, the two did not see each other. Until two months later, Azhi found that he was pregnant.Only then did I get in touch with Xiaoqiang again.
It is precisely because the relationship between Azhi and Xiaoqiang has developed too fast that the two of them have neither emotional foundation and lack of understanding of each other, which makes them contradictory after they live together.
So, how does Xiaoqiang look at his relationship with Azhi?Why is Azhi still unwilling to obtain a marriage certificate with her for 7 months?
Azhi decided to ask Xiaoqiang to ask for a statement.
The mediation officer contacted Xiaoqiang through the phone, and the other party expressed his willingness to meet with Azhi.
Xiaoqiang said that he did not want to be responsible for Azhi. He had already stated to Azhi that he asked Azhi to go home to tell his parents clearly. The two people sat down and talked well, but Azhi did not respond to himself.
After listening to her boyfriend, Azhi emotionally said: You don’t care about me, I told your mother, your mother does not care about me, your mother also said something insulting me, saying that the child in my belly is not necessarily youof.
It is not difficult to hear from Azhi’s words that the contradiction between her and Xiaoqiang is not simple, but Xiaoqiang thinks that the relationship between the two of them is because Azhi is too irritable.
Recalling why the door was dropped that night, Xiaoqiang said that he was a takeaway delivery person. On the day he quarreled with Azhi, he went home very late and gave Azhi a lot of them. He lay in bed and played in bed.After a while, I fell asleep, but Azhi woke him up, saying that he had affected his rest.
Xiaoqiang said, "I’m sick," but did not expect Azhi to lose his temper. In order not to intensify the contradiction between the two, Xiaoqiang chose to leave.
After listening to Xiaoqiang’s words, Azhi bluntly said that this was a lie. She bluntly said that Xiaoqiang had a domestic violence on herself.
But if Xiaoqiang is really responsible for Azhi, why didn’t he want to obtain a marriage certificate with Azhi?
Xiaoqiang said that the reason why he did not receive a marriage certificate with Azhi was because of the etiquette of marriage and the seventh seven -eight 8888 incident.It ’s done.
However, the mediation staff felt that Xiaoqiang’s words were a bit overwhelming. In the face of the mediationist’s doubts, Xiaoqiang finally said the hidden worry. He bluntly said: He suspects that the child in Azhi’s belly is not his, but he cannot be sure.
Xiaoqiang said that we met with a blind date for 4 days, and then lived in her house for a night, and there was no contact in the middle. After more than a month, she told me that I had a child. I said that I had a child and I must be responsible to the end, but I ca n’t.100 % determined that this child is mine.
In this regard, Azhi said that the night when I was together, I was pregnant, just once.
Xiaoqiang said that he wanted to wait for the child to complete the parent -child identification with the child, and then obtain the marriage certificate with Azhi.
During this period, Xiaoqiang hoped that Azhi would return to his hometown and live with his mother.
In this regard, Azhi was unwilling. She said that she had lived with the prospective mother -in -law for a while, but the living habits of the two were different. The prospective mother -in -law was a very frugal person.When people step on, the prospective mother -in -law will pick it up and wash it.
The prospective mother -in -law stewed the fish for Azhi, but it was delicious but fishy. Azhi did not want to eat, but the prospective mother -in -law had to eat her.
The difference in living habits has caused a lot of contradictions between Azhi and the prospective mother -in -law. Azhi wants to return to her hometown to live, but because of her unmarried as a pregnancy, she is worried that after returning to her hometown, sheParents will not be able to lift their heads.
Later, after mediation, Azhi stated that she was willing to return to her mother -in -law’s life for a while. After the child was born, she discussed the marriage with Xiaoqiang.
Xiaoqiang also said that in the future, he will bear his own responsibilities and try his best to care and take care of his girlfriend. After the child is born, he will consider the marriage problem with Azhi.
At this point, Xiaoqiang’s love story with Azhi temporarily came to an end.
Regarding marriage, French writer Rousseau once said such a sentence in the book "Ai Er":
A person’s marriage can determine the fate of a person’s life, so you must consider it in full time.
This sentence tells us a truth: Marriage and having children are a lifelong event of a person. You need to treat it carefully. If you can easily give yourself to others because of the impulse, this will only cause your life to be in trouble.middle.
In Azhi’s love story with Xiaoqiang, Azhi is too hasty because he treats feelings, so she will have a close relationship with Xiaoqiang shortly after meeting Xiaoqiang, so that she will fall into the passive passive pregnancy before the marriageIn the situation.
From the story of Xiaoqiang and Azhi, we can get at least three points of inspiration:
First, a good love relationship requires understanding and tolerance between couples.
The contradiction between Xiaoqiang and Azhi seemed to be just because Xiaoqiang influenced the trivial matter of Azhi’s rest, in fact, because Azhi felt that Xiaoqiang did not understand and tolerate her.
I was irritable during pregnancy, and I felt that I was suddenly deserted, which caused Azhi to vent her negative emotions to her boyfriend Xiaoqiang.Aza felt painful.
If Xiaoqiang can care, understand and tolerate some of Azhi in daily life, Azhi will not quarrel with Xiaoqiang under the irritability, and the relationship between the two may be more harmonious.
Second, in the relationship between love and marriage, only women who know self -love can gain the respect and love of lovers.
The reason why Xiaoqiang hesitated to his love with Azhi was because Azhi was pregnant in a short period of time with him.